A lecturer's tale (2)

My first lecturing post was at Chesterfield College of Technology. I was invited to speak to the Chesterfield Chamber of Trade, a group of local retailers. It was agreed that my subject would be the Trades Description Act 1972.

On arrival at the event I was plied with drink. Then we sat down for lunch. I was placed between the president of the august organisation and the secretary. Just as the main course was completed the president asked me what I was going to talk about. My answer elicited the response: nay lad, we 'ad a speaker on that last week, th'll 'ave to speak abart summat else.'


Rather put me off my pudding. Coffee was served and to the accompaniment of tinkling cups and saucers I was 'on'. The next twenty minutes passed quickly and with a sigh of relief I sat down to what I can only describe as polite applause. There followed a few questions which I thought I answered rather well. And then it was all over. I admit I was somewhat disappointed that having given an extempore speech the reaction had been so muted.

A reporter from the local evening rag hove into view and congratulated me on my speech. Could he ask me a couple of questions for clarification? It will be in the paper tomorrow night (a Friday) said he. I scanned the paper but couldn't see anything.

Next day, whilst enjoying a drink in the Market Hotel the reporter came in and I remonstrated with him that the article had not appeared. Off he went to his office and came back with the offending newspaper. The front page banner headline read: Fraudulent Traders Slammed! The story which followed was based on my speech but much of it was taken out of context.

The following Monday morning was interesting. My head of department was beside himself with rage as I had upset members of his advisory committee and a couple of governors into the bargain. Eventually it was smoothed over.