Friday 9 September 2011

You have not failed to pass the test.

I lived in Chesterfield for a number of years. Chesterfield and Mansfield are rivals no more so than at football. Sadly, Mansfield are now in the Conference. One of the few good things that could be said about Mansfield was Mansfield Bitter. A marvellous beer, Mansfield Brewery had many pubs in Chesterfield and was a strong rival to Wards, Stones, John Smiths and Tetley bitters.  There was once an excellent beer, Barnsley Bitter brewed at Oakwell Brewery, but sadly it was lost to John Smith's in the 1970s.

In 1999, Mansfield Brewery was taken over and production of Mansfield Bitter was moved to Wolverhampton. There the water the beer was produced with tasted quite different from the taste Mansfield drinkers were used to, so demand for Mansfield bitter fell drastically in the local area.
The brewery in Mansfield was closed in early 2002 and demolished in 2008.

I spent many a happy hour drinking Mansfield Bitter prior to 1990.

I did not visit Mansfield very often but on doing so on one occasion parked outside the brewery. Returning to my car in the dark, I had to negotiate Mansfield's one way system to pick up a colleague and used the viaduct spanning the town as my marker. I got lost, saw a side street which looked as though it might take me to my destination and dived down it.  Next thing I saw were flashing blue lights behind me.  I pulled over to let the police car pass and it stopped behind me!

Out came the constabulary from their car and asked me if I had been drinking. Why had I been pulled over?  My sharp turn into the side street had been a bit too sharp they said.  So, into the police car and blow into the machine.  Lights flashed: a pause and then the verdict: You have not failed to pass the test.  Strange choice of words I thought.

A few weeks later I was driving through Pilsley towards Mansfield.  A car in a side road to my right started to move out in front of me, the driver thought better of it and braked, only to be hit in the rear by a police car.  I was tempted to stop and offer copious supporting evidence to the driver who had been shunted into, but there were pedestrians around who had seen the incident at far closer quarters than I had, so I drove on.

A few days later I received a telephone call from the Nottinghamshire Constabulary.  They had tracked me down and wanted me to make a statement about the accident.  Next day I reported to Mansfield police station and made a statement, or rather I said what I had seen which was translated into police-speak for me to sign.

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